Gay Area - Free Life and Equal Rights

Safe Sex

Fri, 22 Dec 2006 00:00:00 -0600

STD's (or sexually transmitted diseases) are important thing to those who have sex life.

Though many of STD�s can be cured, some may need a long treatment and some still remain incurable.

You can use these prevention tips to decrease the risk of contamination.

1. Be informed

If you know the symptoms of sexually transmitted diseases, it can help you prevent yourself from risk of contamination.

2. Watch out

Information can be insufficient to protect you from diseases. You can find out such signs as unusual discharges, pimples or eruption and other signs of infections.

You can do the "check-up" during the foreplay, while undressing and massaging.

Don't try to test your stamina if you discovered something suspicious: the best way will be to keep yourself from sexual activity and advise your partner consult the doctor.

3. Try to avoid casual sex activity

Multiple sex partners increase the risk to venereal diseases contamination.

4. Be honest

If you have or think you have a sexually transmitted disease, it would be better to inform your partner of this.

It can urge your partner to watch over the possible symptoms and will help to prevent circulation of the infection.

5. Don't put off the checkup

Timely diagnosis increases the effectiveness of the treatment and helps to avoid complications.

Most dangerous infections are viral and bacterial ones (AIDS, hepatitis B, syphilis). Their causative agents live in various biologic fluids of a man, first of all in blood and sperm.

Lesions and wounds let the infection penetrate the other organism via blood.

Mucous parts contact closely during kissing. The risk is less than during a genital or oral contacts, but still you should be aware for such STD's as:

genital herpes
syphilis
hepatitis A,
anogenital warts

Oral sex includes such risks of spreading and getting chlamydeous infection, gonorrhea, hepatitis B and C, genital herpes, syphilis and anogenital warts. HIV is possible if you have wounds on skin or mucous parts.

Mutual masturbation that includes rubbing of the genitals may be dangerous if a semen gets into a wounded part of the body.

Anal contacts risks are high and include hepatitis A,B and C, HIV, genital herpes, gonorrhea, syphilis, parasitic infections and others.

The safiest way to protect you from STD's is to use condoms not only during genital and anal sex but during oral sex and rimming as well.

This can be a rather reasonable thing to do when you have casual sex contacts. The most important thing to remember is that condom should be you "best friend", available at any time you are sexually active.

First date tips

Fri, 22 Dec 2006 00:00:00 -0600

You met him and realized that you want to continue your acquaintance, you've probably changed your phone numbers and you are waiting for a date, which promises to be great.

First of all, don't be nervous. First date is just a first date. The worst thing that can happen to you is that you won't see him again.
Chose a place that you know best, where you feel comfortable and will be able to talk without disturbance. It can be a restaurant or a bar.

Other public places such as cinema or a football match can be too public to have enough time to talk in quiet.

First impression is very strong; this fact was known long ago. Don't ignore to care about your appearance. Clean clothes and underwear, pleasant scent would do the best.

If you don�t know his clothing tastes well, it would be better to put on something that is not so extravagant, not mentioning that it should suit the situation.
At the beginning of your date you may feel rather confused, worrying about what is going on in his mind, did you make a good impression or not and so on.

Believe me, he is thinking the same things.
You can discuss anything, more important is "how" than "what". Listen to him attentively, but remember that behind words stay real emotions.

Intonation and gestures tell more about him than words actually. Use your eyes, they are much more expressive, and trust your intuition.
Don�t go too far in your expectations; you can never be sure if he is a guy of your dream, especially because he can turn out to be not what your imagination has drawn so colorfully.
If you are not sure about his sex orientation, it would be better not to make him face the naked truth just at once: "I�m a gay. Let's start."
Try to gather as much information about him as possible, for example you can find out what he really thinks of gays by discussing related topics in films or TV programs, where he can tell his opinion.

And you should always weigh possible consequences and chances before.

Even if he will turn out to be a heterosexual, you may stay friends at least.

Gays and fashion

Fri, 22 Dec 2006 00:00:00 -0600

For centuries fashion has been a powerful art to express one's individuality. No wonder design, fashion and gays were not only connected, but also associated with each other.

1. Feminine style

In early twenty century gays stayed quite hidden and secluded. In order to identify other gays and express their identities gays took over a feminine style.

For many gays this daring choice of a dress, which was meant for a woman was a way of pointing out their sex orientation.

Some used most obvious marking of feminine manners and features: lipstick, dyed hair, high-heeled shoes, and woman's outfit.

Though feminine style was rather dangerous, for many gays it was the only way to join a gay society.
Later clothing, which is associated with female gender, was adopted by "drag queens"- gay performers, who were participating at various gay events, such as gay prides, shows and celebrations.

2. Secret signs

Till the time gays became more open, they needed to use some codes to make their orientation non-obvious for gay-unfriendly society and clear for other gays.

Often it was expressed through particular colors and accessory, like green cravats, which were worn in Paris, and green carnation in London.

Green color was believed to imply wearer's homosexuality since the ancient Rome and developed through the first part of twentieth century. By the 60's one of the well known worldwide secret signs were suede shoes.

3. Masculine style

1960-70's was a period when feminine style fades and most gays turn to a most traditional fashion. Such social events as gay liberation movement make gays change their appearance.

In USA masculine dress becomes even more distinct. Gays keep to exaggerated masculinity by wearing cowboy outfit, or looking like a lumberman.

More and more gays are moving to the cities, were they became more overt and adopt this new masculine look: short haircut, moustaches, muscular body and clothes, which outline it.

Some develop "leather" style, associated with S&M, and apply symbols or "hanky codes". Back-pocket handkerchief of various colors denoted gay's sexual preferences and served as a particular form of communication.

Top ten famous gays

Tue, 26 Dec 2006 00:00:00 -0600

Elton John
Rupert Everett
George Michael
Jean-Paul Gaultier
Boy George
Neil Tennant
Freddie Mercury
Michael Stipe
Stephen Fry
Graham Norton

Elton John

Sir Elton John is one of the most successful musicians and pop singers. Elton John (original name Reginald Kenneth Dwight) was born on March 25, 1947, in Pinner, Middlesex, England.

From the early childhood he connected his life with music, playing piano in the Royal Academy of Music. In 70's he gained worldwide popularity and success and was said to be the most flamboyant and outstanding performer.

His well-known singles "Rocket man", "Saturday Night's Alright (for Fighting)", "Bennie and the Jets", "I Guess That's Why They Call It the Blues", "I'm Still Standing" and many others appeared in Top 40 record charts for more than 30 years. Also founded AIDS organization contributing much to prevention and prejudice elimination against HIV/AIDS people.

In 1994 Elton John was knighted by Queen Elizabeth II. In May 2005 he announced, that he is planning to register his long partnership with filmmaker David Furnish.

His famous quote: There is nothing wrong with going to bed with someone of your own sex. People should be free with sex, they should draw the line at goats.

Rupert Everett

Rupert Everett became open about his homosexuality since 1989. Born in England in a well-being family in May 29, 1959, Everett discovered acting at the age of 15.

Making first steps in film acting he soon won audience recognition. He was honored by Drama Theatre Awards as Most Promising New Actor of 1980. His major films include: "Another country"(1984), "My best friend's wedding"(1997), "Shakespeare in love"(1998), "An Ideal Husband"(1999),"The importance of being earnest"(2002) and many others.

Though often acted as gay character, is well-known for other magnificent roles. Lately he has extended his talent in animation, like prince Charming voice in "Shreck 2".His decision to "come out" didn"t influenced his film career, on the contrary he proved that people are talented irrespective of their sex orientation.

His famous quote: Why would I wear pink trousers? It's hard enough being gay.

George Michael

George Michael (or Georgios Kyriakos Panagiotou) born on June 25, 1963 won his fame as a popular singer and songwriter. His early success came when he sang in "Wham", which he formed together with his best friend Andrew Ridgelev in the first half of 1980's.

Through his career he performed in a wide range of music styles from rap to solo ballads and funky dance music. Such worldwide singles as "Careless Whisper", "Last Christmas", "Freedom 90", "Fastlove", "Jesus To A Child", won him a true recognition as one of the best Male Singers.

His debut album "Faith" became number 1 all over the world more than once. After an incident at Beverly Hills Park in the rest room, where he was arrested for "engaging in lewd act" he became open as a gay.

His famous quote: You'll never find peace of mind until you listen to your heart.

Jean-Paul Gaultier

Jean-Paul Gaultier, probably the most eccentric and controversial fashion designer was named an "enfant terrible of French fashion". He was born on April 24, 1952 in Arqueil, France.

Indeed he didn't have any education as a designer, but from the early age was obsessed with the idea of becoming a famous fashion designer, sketching imaginary collections.

His talent didn't pass unnoticed and in 1970 he was hired by world-known stylist Pierre Cardin. Since he started his first collection, he shocked the audience and fashion word with his fanciful models. His legendary style is an incredible mixture of styles, cultures and traditions.

Public was astonished when he presented his men models wearing skirts or he broke all the traditional rules with the old and tattooed models. His outfits are worn by Madonna, Sting, Tom Cruise, Bruce Willis and many others. After the death of his love Francis Menuge of AIDS, he is contributing much to AIDS organizations.

His famous quote: A man does not wear his masculinity in his clothes.

Boy George

Boy George was born in London in on June 14 1961. Since he started to perform in 80's group Culture Club, Boy George soon became a pop idol in and outside London. His albums sell more than 33 million records and his everlasting hit "Do you really want to hurt me?" reached number one in GB.

Known also for his shocking outfit , make-up and bisexual looks he easily became a fashion ideal of 80's.Unfortunately his solo career was on decline when he admitted drug addiction and relationship with his drummer Jon Moss. Lately Boy George became one of the most prominent and popular DJ in UK and USA.

His autobiography "Take it like a man" became a bestseller. His soulful voice is still not fading and his music proves his talent over and over again.

His famous quote: Separation penetrates the disappearing person like a pigment and steeps him in gentle radiance.

Neil Tennant

Neil Tennant is a British singer of a famous group Pet Shop Boys. He was born on July 10, 1954 in North Shields, UK. Together with his colleague Chris Lower he formed their prominent group and made a successful career in Britain and all over the world.

Pet Shop Boys sound is a mixture of synthesized music, spoken words and Tennant's laconic singing. Popular hits, such as "It's a sin", "Can't take my eyes off you", "Always on my mind" and more than 13 albums made a history in pop music. More than twenty years Pet Shop Boys music proves its successful history.

In 1994 he declared his homosexuality and "came out". Since then he is a strong supporter of gay and lesbian rights, appearing at gay prides and other celebrations.

His famous quote: Because some people have sex with people of the same sex, an entire culture has been created, broadly speaking, out of oppression. Which in a rational world would not be an issue.

Freddie Mercury

Legendary Freddie Mercury was born on September 5, 1946 in small island of Zanzibar. In 1970's he formed Queen together with Taylor and Brian May and John Deacon, which at an early stage of its career was faced with hostile critics of Queen's and especially Freddie Mercury's queerness.

After the album of Queen II was released, world was conquered by their fabulous performances and music. An enormous number of hits, among which are �Show must go on�, "Bohemian Rhapsody", "Somebody to Love", "We Are the Champions" and more, captured the audience from the first sounds.

Freddie Mercury possessed a stunning voice with incredible power, wide range and magnetism, which made him a true music idol. For ten years the Queen released more than 60 million records and gathered huge stadiums.

Through his lifetime Freddie Mercury did�t stated his sexual orientation definitely, though it was inevitable to hide some facts of his life. After the separation with Mary Austin, he was living till his death with Jim Hutton. The day he declared he suffered from AIDS was a last until the world had to face the sad news about his death on November 24, 1991.

His famous quote: The most important thing, darling, is to live a fabulous life. As long as it's fabulous I don't care how long I live.

Michael Stipe

Michael Stipe is a well-known musician, who heads one of the most influential rock bands R.E.M. He was born on January 4, 1960 in Georgia, USA.

In the beginning of the 80's, when R.E.M has formed, their music was not in the mainstream, but later somber lyrics of R.E.M. songs became more and more popular and their albums "Out of Time" (1991), and "Automatic for the People" (1992) came in the forefront of music world.

Michael Stipe widens the horizons of his creativity, publishing his photo collections and making films. He came out in 2001, confirming he was in relationship for 3 years.

His famous quote: I've always felt that sexuality is a really slippery thing. In this day and age, it tends to get categorized and labeled, and I think labels are for food. Canned food.

Stephen Fry

Stephen Fry was born on August 24 in 1957 in England. A talented actor, comedian, novelist and TV presenter Stephen Fry always surprises others with his wit and humor as well as outstanding acting. His life underwent a real crisis, when he attempted suicide after he "came out", being 16 years old. Studying at Queen's College, Cambridge he met Hugh Laurie, with whom he unites in a writing partnership.

In 80's he works mainly on TV in comedy shows "A Bit of Fry & Laurie" and "Blackadder". In "Jeeves & Wooster" he gains popularity, acting a shrewd buttler character. In his writing career he released 3 bestsellers in 4 years. Much contribution he is making to Britain newspapers, such as Daily Telegraph.

His famous quote: My first words, as I was being born�I looked up at my mother and said �that�s the last time I'm going up one of those (Stephen Fry on being gay)

Graham Norton

Born as Graham Wilson on April 4, 1963 in Ireland, Graham Norton is a magnificent TV presenter, well-known for his TV shows with celebrities in UK. His suggestive jokes won him a place in the list of the 50 Funniest persons in British comedy.

In his search to fulfill a dream of becoming a journalist, he finally joined the Central School of Speech and Drama in London, where he altered his name to Graham Norton, which was after his grandmother's maiden name.

He is open gay and his own shows So Graham Norton, V. Graham Norton and The Graham Norton Effect on Channel Four in Britain go with a great success. Graham Norton won a number of awards from BAFTA's (British Academy Awards) for Best Entertainment Performance.

His famous quote: My version of falling in love is borderline psychotic. Should be avoided at all costs. Get obsessed. Can't fall in love and function at the same time. All-consuming. Tunnel vision. Euphoric.

Common myths about gays

Tue, 26 Dec 2006 00:00:00 -0600

1. Heterosexual love is the only norm for people; otherwise it should be considered pathology.

Love does't have the only norm, pattern or some other certain rules to follow. Sometimes we tend to name pathology something that we cannot explain or something we haven't any idea of.

2. Gays hate women.

To love a man doesn't mean that you therefore will be unfriendly towards women. Love is a positive feeling and it doesn't affect your attitude towards the opposite sex.

3. Homosexuality can be changed through a therapy.

Gays are not ill therefore it can not be cured. Psychological or medical treatment is useless, as sexual and emotional feelings cannot be changed artificially.

4. One can choose whether to be or not to be a gay.

Most gays sense their orientation as natural, but not a choice, they need to make. We fall in love with somebody irrespective of his or her sex because of complicated emotional and psychological feelings.

5. Most gays have mental diseases, they more often commit suicide and suffer neuroses.

This is an absolutely false statement, and it is a universally acknowledged fact that it has nothing to do with mental disease. There are no more neurotics among gays than within heterosexual community.

6. You can readily distinguish a gay as they have particular �female� manners.

You can come across a gay and most probably won't pay attention that they are somewhat different. Most people have both feminine and masculine features, and it can be someone's own particular characteristic but not necessarily determines his behavior. The way of behavior can be rather various depending on the individuality.

7. Gays are more sexually aggressive; they solicit young men in public places.

There are no proves that gays are more active sexually than heterosexual men, neither is the difference between them in soliciting in public places.

8. Gay couple goes against nature as they can�t give birth to a child.

Every tenth heterosexual couple is childless. So nobody punishes them for that.

9. Gays adopt children in order to bring up a gay.

You can't bring somebody up a gay, there are no scientifically proven facts that you can educate anyone sexual orientation, otherwise everybody in our society would be a heterosexual.

10. AIDS is a punishment for gays.

Doctors at first discovered gays to be infected with AIDS, but this are a pure coincidence. Why does God punish children with poliomyelitis or any other disease? Is there a punishment for some sin?
People with different background, religion and skin color have AIDS; this disease doesn�t choose a particular person with a "particular orientation".

Warming effect of your lubricant

Thu, 4 Jan 2007 00:00:00 -0600

Why you need artificial lubrication

In some cases during anal love making you may feel the dryness in your ass and as a result the irritating sensations.

The pleasure of sex in this case is poor and both partners receive non-natural feeling.

Rectum doesn't create the natural lubrication in comparison with female vagina, so the use of lubrication is needed in most cases.

Lubricants you prefer

Those who do not have any problems with dryness may choose the lubes with special properties.

One of them is a warming lubricant that includes some ingredients adding the warm pleasure to the areas applied to.

Warming lubricants may come in the water-based and silicone-based variants. Those that contain silicone are usually used for anal explorations, they are a little stickier and provide the perfect glide.

The warming agent adds spice to the anal sex and provides both partners with the wonderful sensations.There are warming lubricants with fruity or herbal flavors for sweet love.

Why it warms

The ingredients included in the list of lubricants are intended for creating the hot feel in the spots it is applied to.

For example, some lubes contain capsaicin that is one of the components of chili pepper, making them hot. Of course, such ingredient may cause very strong warm sensations on the sensitive skin of your erogenous zones.

Side effects

!!! If you have any allergic reactions on one of the lubes' ingredients, you should stop its application.

Some people also may feel irritation and even pain.

In this case try to use other lubricants. The warming lubricants stimulate the appearing of some infections especially yeast infection in women.

Gay: the whys and wherefores

Thu, 1 Feb 2007 00:00:00 -0600

Opinions that concern homosexuality vary from hatred and hypocrisy till sympathy and manifestation.

Earlier homosexuality was said to be a perversion, which was a sexual attraction towards individuals of the same sex, or even an illness that was characterized by abnormal drive towards the same sex.
And these statements still occur in spite of the fact that in 1973 American Psychiatric Association's Board removed homosexuality from the official manual and in 1991 World Health Organization declared it not a disease state or mental disorder.

Questions about what is the main cause that leads to this particular sex orientation remain still open and controversial (disputed). Authors that tried to analyze this moot point divided their opinions into several categories.

Sigmund Freud was one of the first to propose a theory that all individuals are inherently bisexual. Later one can become homosexual as a result of family environment peculiarities.

Due to his believes sex orientation is forming between 3 and 5 years old, when a boy feels strong love and sexual feelings towards his mother and almost hatred feelings towards his father, as he sees him a rival.

This phenomenon has become a well-known Oedipus complex in psychology. When a child overcomes this complex, his sex orientation most probably becomes traditional.

Otherwise when a boy stays fixed on this stage of development due to wrong relationships between his parents, he identifies himself with his mother and this results in a desire to submit himself to a man.

Such facts as over-dominating, indifferent and overprotecting mother or hostile, dough-faced father or his absence can predispose a boy to homoerotism.

Nevertheless, it should be mentioned that these factors don't determine that a child surely will become gay. Many children that were born in various unfavorable family conditions keep to heterosexual orientation.

Alfred Kinsey discovered that same-sex contacts and moreover homoerotic feelings are quite wide-spread. He made a great contribution in declaring homosexuality not pathology or illness, but a norm of behavior.

Still neither of psychological theories was certainly proved and many scientists began searching for other reasons. For this purpose there were made several investigations on groups of binovular and monovular twins, that proved that if one of the twins was homosexual in monovular pair other one will be homosexual in almost 100%.

Many scientists considered hormonal influence very important too. Nevertheless, hormonal injections didn�t affect sexual orientation anyway.

The main problem is that nobody knows why one becomes homosexual as well as nobody knows why the other becomes heterosexual. It would be silly to name homosexuality an illness if you can't explain this or both your intolerance and ignorance don't let you be more loyal with gays.

Ups and downs of a gay commitment

Sat, 3 Mar 2007 00:00:00 -0600

Gay relationship undergoes the same whims as many man-woman relationships do. No wonder that some problems occurring after your relationship steps over a "honeymoon stage" are the almost the same as those in a traditional couple. The exception may lie in an increased pressure your couple may experience when facing misunderstandings and condemnation from the others.

Family roles and duties

It would be better to think over your responsibilities before jumping into a long-lasting relationship. The roles and duties you�ll decide to take depend on your individual opportunities and wishes.

Try to find compromise, and talk all the problems aloud, rather than keeping them in complicated mazes of your soul, accumulating them till the boiling point.

When a routine and boredom sets in

The most difficult in a relationship is rather to save what we�ve already accumulated, than to begin something new. Sooner or later you can come to a line, when you think that you know everything about him and there is nothing to search for. Events are repeated again and again, talks are no more interesting and exciting as they were in the beginning.

Crisis you are going through doesn�t necessarily mean you�ve come to an end. Many heterosexual couples decide to have a child at this stage; you may not have such opportunity or desire. Other reasons are rather doubtful ones to tie you both together for long. Try to vary your pastime. You can fill your life with fresh sensations, spending time it in parachute jumping or discussing something new.

In search for sex experiments

Variety of sex experience could be a very good idea to refresh your relationship: tantric sex, new poses and other experiments are reasonable and helpful sometimes, but not always. It won�t save the unit, if the main cause is lack of new feelings towards each other.

Extramarital partner

When sex no longer satisfies, many couples settle the matter searching for other guys. This is truly the easiest way or a never-ending story - you are free to decide.

May be you should look for a change inside yourself, rather than outside your couple. Think whether an escape is worth it.

Your love relationship turned out to be not what you imagined it to be. As a matter of fact there is no such relationship that goes without fluctuations at times. You have a chance to make your partnership more intimate and unique.

Homosexuality prohibited in schools

Wed, 28 Mar 2007 00:00:00 -0500

Students from Montgomery County are pressed on finding excuses to miss recently introduced sex-educational classes that provide information on sexual orientation and condom use.

The test lessons on homosexuality were taught at several high schools (Watkins Mill, Bethesda-Chevy Chase high schools) and middle schools (at Argyle and Julius West, Sherwood High School, Westland Middle School middle schools).

More than 10 percent of pupils from 10th- grade and 8th-grade handed in parental-permission slip and others couldn't attend classes as they had no permission slip. Brian Edwards, county schools spokesman, claimed that students had a possibility to attend alternative lessons.

But some of Citizens group members insist on cancellation of sex-ed lessons and call parents to nix their children learn "abnormal" things.

After a new sex-educational program was confirmed at county school board in January, the first test lessons fell under criticism of some parents who didn't want their children to be taught something that doesn't coincide to their family beliefs. Citizen group appealed to state Board of Education to halt lessons they consider inappropriate.

However, those students who have already attended pilot sex-educational lessons found them helpful and unbiased. Children are informed on such things as homosexuality, bisexuality, transgender, homophobia and condom use. Parents who stand by Citizen group oppose that lessons should teach their children on heterosexual marriage as the only option for accepted lifestyle.

Supporters of new curriculum say they do not impose any point of view. Jim Kennedy, a founding member of teachthefacts.org, who stands for curriculum says that classes could be attended by students who agree on the program.

This is the first time county public schools include sex-educational lessons on sexual orientation and final word on new curriculum is anticipated by the next fall. As the school board decision is still not conclusive, parents who do not give their children permission to attend classes will fail to explain their disapproval with the new program.

Is my jealousy reasonable?

Fri, 22 Jun 2007 00:00:00 -0500

Jealousy is a feeling that is common for all people irrespective of their age, gender and sexual orientation. It is one of the strongest, the most painful and destroying emotions. You do realize that jealousy makes you nervous, prevents you from sleeping at night and in general causes a great deal of discomfort, to say the least of it. At the same time you do understand that this emotion is inevitable, and you do want to know whether your jealousy is groundless or the situation is so that you can justly experience this feeling.

When jealousy is reasonable

Your willingness to understand whether you have just reasons for jealousy is quite natural, as no one wants to experience useless bad emotions. The following information will help you to understand whether your (or your partner's) jealousy is grounded.

His strange behavior. If some considerable and inexplicable changes occurred in the routine of your life, than your suspicions might be grounded. In this situation you have the right to desire an explanation and to let your partner know about your worries. This should be done as soon as any suspicions occurred so as not to aggravate the situation.

Open flirtation. You have the right to be jealous if your partner outrageously flirts with another guy. This shows his bad manners and you have the right to express your dissatisfaction with his behavior and to reproach him. Your partner could be far from intention to insult you and he could hurt you intentionally, in order to make sure you love him. Also he could provoke your jealousy just for entertainment. Whatever reasons for such behavior your partner had he was wrong and he should know about that.

When jealousy is unreasonable?

Jealousy is unreasonable if it is caused only by your feeling of being suspicious and by your lack of self-confidence. Endless questions about the way your partner spends spare time without you, that are asked only because you suspect him of having some other life without you, are insulting. Such questions will destroy your relationships unless you stop being so suspicious. Examining his lingerie in order to find any physical evidences of his unfaithfulness are thoughtless, unless you have doubtless proofs that he cheats on you.

It is very unreasonably to be jealous of your partner's feelings to men whom he knew and whom he loved before he met you. The very fact that he is staying with you now should be enough to be sure he needs you.

If you never express your jealousy, than, perhaps you are a very wise person. However, never let your partner hurt or insult you. Your partner must respect you, as only in this case your relationships will be stable and long-lasting.

Is It Good or Bad to be a Gay?

Tue, 31 Jul 2007 00:00:00 -0500

Gays, unlike heterosexuals have different attitude towards their sexual orientation. Some of them are happy with their being gays while others are not. What are the main reasons for sorrow about being a gay?

It is a sin

Some gays suffer from feeling of guilt as, being persuaded by society they think that homosexuality is a sin. The story about Sodom that evoked God's anger is often associated with homosexuality. However, the Bible does not imply this: people in Sodom sinked into debauch and wanted to involve God's agents. This is why Sodom was chastened by God. Homosexuality has nothing to do with these events.

In fact, Apostles Moses and Paul condemned homosexuality. However, the main reason for this condemnation, as historians have proven, was fight with other religious faiths that were based on sacral sex that often was homosexual.

At the same time Christianity is not based on the list of sins. It is based on ideas of love and tolerance towards other people (that is why some churches perform wedding ceremonies for gays and lesbians).

Christianity forbids pointing out other people's sins as no one is saint. This should be kept in mind by those who condemn homosexuals.

This is abnormal

Some gays feel unhappy with their sexual orientation as it is considered abnormal. Many people think that a gay cannot be happy as he cannot have relationships with a woman like all other people. Also it is much more difficult for a gay to find a partner as there are more heterosexual people than gays. The choice is too small.

Look at the situation from another point of view. Don't you know that there are lots of lonely and unhappy heterosexual people? Among heterosexuals, whose wish to have love and family is considered normal there are lots of those who feel lonely or who are unhappy with their marriage. Happiness is not rained by haven like manna. must be searched and deserved, so both homosexuals and heterosexuals are equal in this aspect.

What to the common idea that relationships between a man and a woman is normal while relationships between two men are not, who set this norm? It is normal to love and to be happy, no matter with whom, with a man or with a woman.

Some gays do not worry about religion and being up to norms. Right they are. At the same time there are those who do think that being a gay is something that raises you higher than others.

Is homosexuality the sign of being exceptional?

Some gays think so since many famous people were gays: Russian composer Tchaikovsky, Oscar Wilde, Leonard Bernstein, Leonardo Da Vinci and many others. At the same time there are many famous heterosexual people who were not a bit less talented than gays. So the fact that you are a gay does not mean you are exceptional. Among gays there are lots of ordinary people, and you are likely to be one of them.

So is it good or bad to be a gay?

In fact it is neither good nor bad. On the one hand � intolerance of the society and many difficulties that you have to face, on the other hand you, like all others wish to be happy and you take a great deal of pains to get happiness, like all other people do. It is up to you to decide whether you are happy with your sexual orientation or not, but do keep in mind that to be or not to be happy is a matter of choice.

Wise people say that happiness is state of mind. Nothing can prevent you from being happy. Choose to be happy!

How to come out?

Mon, 24 Sep 2007 00:00:00 -0500

Though many gays accept their sexuality quite easy, for many of them "coming out" is a difficult and long process. Realization may happen in the early youth, when you first feel that you are somewhat different from others.

You may have had strange or vague idea how to define your difference, asking yourself whether it's normal or you don't know how to react towards this fact. There can be various ways of developing your feelings till you accept your identity in sex orientation terms.

Some of you may unconsciously choose a defense behavior, increasing sexual contacts with the opposite sex to prove themselves that this "condition" is temporary. Other can avoid any information that concerns homosexuality for fear of revealing "awful" things.

Some can transform their fears into hostility that is directed toward other gays, trying to restrain their own feelings. One more way out can be drugs and alcohol, where you can hide from yourself. This struggle with yourself can be painful and long enough until you realize to face the truth.

When you decide to "come out", you should expect that this won't be a one-day event. Even if your parents or friends reaction won't be a shock, you may feel as if they didn't wanted to talk with you about it, discussing this topic behind your back. You should know that once you told somebody about your sex orientation, information can get about quite soon, so be prepared to every attitude from condemnation till sympathy.

Tips for gays, who decided to confess:

First of all try to choose a person you trust mostly, be this he or she, your brother or sister, your close friend, or a parent.
Try to choose the right time for a serious talk. You should be sure they take in your words thoughtfully without haste. It would be better for you to be in a steady emotional state.
Keep in mind the main reason, why you decided to talk about it. If you wish to astonish or hurt somebody, their reaction can correspond to your aim.
Share all your fears and sincere feelings, telling that you didn't mean to do anyone harm and just need to talk about it because living with this "secret" is unbearable.
If reaction of those close to you is rather unpleasant, give them time to reflect on it. If your friend doesn't want to hear anything, think over whether you need such friends. Remember that your parents may have conflict feelings, which won't necessarily relate to you, but more over with a sense they did something wrong or somebody influenced you bad way.
You can always address professional psychological help or encounter group in your city or region.

Remember, that it's totally your own right to make a decision whether to come out. But hiding your suppressed feelings can be rather difficult to deal with it alone.

Gay Sex: Opening New Horizons

Fri, 5 Oct 2007 00:00:00 -0500

What can prevent you from getting complete satisfaction? Believe it or not, this is your mind, your brains, your morals, your superstitions that do now allow you enjoy sex in all its variety. Your mind makes you concentrate on a problem: not intense orgasm, short or thin penis, weak erection, discrepancy in your and your partner's desires, etc. How to free your mind, to stop worrying and to start getting pleasure?

Consider the following that will help you to free your mind and to explore new horizons in sex.

No limits

Keep in mind the following rule of satisfying sex: everything that gives pleasure to you and your partner is appropriate. Do not restrain yourself and do not think of what is good and what is bad. And, of course never say never. �I'll never do this or that....� But why? Why do you think you'll never like something you don't like right now?

In fact your desires are very likely to depend on your partner. With this partner you never wanted to perform blowjob or fisting, but this doesn't mean you won't want to try these activities with someone else. Now you are mostly the giving partner, but some day you might want to switch the roles. Always be open for something new and untested.

Be sincere with yourself

What is your most daring fantasy? What turns you on? Try to answer this question maximum sincerely. Sometimes it so happens that we conceal our desires from ourselves, for various reasons. Some our fantasies seem to us too dirty or immoral. Some of them are not up to a certain image of good sex that we created in our mind.

Who said that orgasm is the guarantee of satisfaction? Sometimes activities that do not lead to orgasm might be much more satisfying. For instance sensual massage. May be you don't experience a strong orgasm because you don't need one right now? Explore your mind and find out more about your true deep, or even subconscious desires.

Find the right partner

Sex does not require great and everlasting love, but sex without any warm feelings is quite boring and in most cases dissatisfying. That is why you should ask yourself: do I have any good feelings this person or I just want sex? If you realize that your answer is: I want only sex and nothing more you should give up this partner. Thus you will get moral satisfaction and you will not associate sex with something immoral and something that has power over you.

How many partners should I have?

Some people think � the less partners, the better. Ideally, there should be only one partner throughout the life. There is another opinion: the more partners you have, the more satisfying your love life is. Perhaps both opinions are extremes.

Keep in mind that sex is not only physiological mechanism for getting pleasure. Sex is a specific way of communication of two persons. You cannot imagine a person who needs communication with all people he meets, and of course, you can hardly imagine a person who needs only one person for communication throughout his life. The truth is somewhere between two extremes.

Love your body

Keep in mind � there are no ugly bodies. Tastes differ. Someone might no like your body, whereas the other dreams of a partner with body like yours. Feelings are more important. The one who loves you loves your body, as it is your body, the body of the beloved person.

Interesting Events in Gay History

Mon, 12 Nov 2007 00:00:00 -0600

In 1654 Sweden Queen Christine chooses to abdicate the crown because of her love for a woman.

In 1810 First homosexual acts between men on mutual consent, who reached the mature age, are legalized in France

In 1836 last death penalty for homosexuality took place, though the respective law was revoked in 1861.

In 1885 a new law was introduced for homosexuality punishment. Lesbians were not included, as Queen Victoria was not aware of such phenomenon.

On June 8 in 1934, 200 gays were executed in Germany. This was a starting point for genocide of those who were homosexual.

In 1941 head surgeon declares not to persecute gays, who serve in army, if they are not open about their orientation.

In 1944 Sweden repeals criminal liability for homosexuality.

In 1952 USA congress passes the law, which forbids gay�s and lesbian�s the country.

In 1953 Gays and lesbians are forbidden to work in USA federal institutions.

In 1962 In Britain are legalized homosexual acts between mature men, except for law and order workers and service men.

In 1973 American Psychiatric Association removes homosexuality from the list of mental illnesses

In 1988 Sweden grants the same legal and social benefits and tax remissions on homosexual couples as on heterosexual ones.

In 1996 South African Republic is the first country to register law against gay and lesbian�s discrimination.

In 1997 Independent researches in Great Britain and USA proved the fact, that children raised in a lesbian family have no deviations in their development.

Gays Have Bigger Brain Than Heterosexuals

Tue, 20 Nov 2007 00:00:00 -0600

New studies carried out in Toronto allow to suppose that there is some certain correlation between the size of a man's corpus calossum (this organ connects the left and the right hemisphere of brain) and his sexual orientation and some other characteristics.

Neuroscientist Sanda Witelson had proven that there are more left-handed persons among gays than among heterosexuals. One more study showed that left-handed people have bigger corpus calossum than heterosexual persons.

This study lead to the question: is there any difference between anatomy of brain of left-handed and right-handed heterosexuals and right-handed and left-handed homosexuals. Scientists found that the back part of corpus calossum is bigger in homosexuals than in heterosexuals.

Since the size of corpus calossum is inherited, we suppose that sexual orientation is influenced by genetic factor, Witelson said. .

"The results we obtained do not mean that inheritance is inevitable, but they do show that sexual orientation of children can depend on sexual orientation of parents", the doctor said.

Oral Sex. What doctors say

Wed, 5 Dec 2007 00:00:00 -0600

Curiously enough, oral sex is not only enjoyable, it has beneficial influence on your health (or on the health of the both of you if you enjoyed pleasure time in position 69). So what is good about oral sex?

Helps to get rid of stress. Fellatio, being an oral action, like many other actions that deal with oral activity, can diminish stress and help to relax. This oral activity can replace other, more harmful oral activity (for instance smoking). Modern studies have shown that stress can cause such disorders as gastric ulcer and cardiovascular diseases. Oral sex is the best way to get rid of stress without medications!

Better skin. Male sperm contains a great deal of natural lipids and important amino acids. Many creams contain lipids that improve skin. As well sperm contains prostoglandins � natural agents that contribute to better health, as they widen blood vessels and improve blood flow to the skin.

Natural nutrients. Sperm is rich in Zinc and all the known amino acids. Studies have shown that even healthy people might lack zinc. The recommended dose for adults is 15 mg per day. There is a hypothesis that amino acids improve accessibility of Zinc. Fresh sperm contains about 1.25 mg of amino acids that help to produce very important proteins.

Natural protection from ulcers. Fresh sperm contains natural prostoglandins that help to prevent gastritis and duodenal ulcer. Studies show that small doses of prostoglandins protect from ulcers caused by stress, hydrochloric acid and even boiling water.

However, most men don't like to swallow sperm. Thus they don't give complete satisfaction to their partners and cannot enjoy the beneficial effect of sperm.

How To Make Sperm Tastier

If you don't like the taste of sperm you can change it. Of course, your partner will have to do something to improve the taste of his sperm, but he will like the process. The fact is that the taste of sperm depends on your nutrition. Have much fruit, especially melon and strawberries, and drink a glass of pine-apple juice a day. The result will be evident in 3-4 days.

What worsens the taste of sperm? These are smoking and alcohol: nicotine makes sperm acid, while alcohol makes it bitter. So let your partner know that he should not smoke and should not drink alcohol if he wants you to swallow his load.

Have a little liqueur and let a few drops of it remain in your mouth. Sperm will seem to you quite tasty.

If no tricks help you to like the taste of sperm, than you will have to think of what to do so that not to swallow sperm and not to insult your partner.

How to avoid swallowing?

1. Keep the sperm behind the cheek and go to the bathroom. This method is suitable if your partner doesn't release too much sperm.

2. Exactly at the moment of ejaculation position yourself so that sperm could get on your belly. Then make a little sex show for him. Stroke yourself and rub sperm on your body. Most likely he will want to continue.

3. Learn to give him oral pleasure so well that he won't notice you have spit the sperm in a handkerchief.

Gay Couples - a Good Example to Straight Couples

Wed, 23 Jan 2008 00:00:00 -0600

The latest study showed that many straight couples may actually learn from lesbian and gay couples.

Robert-Jay Green, a US psychologist and researcher of the Rockway Institute and of Alliant International University in San Diego said that the study of lesbian and gay couples showed that homosexual couples were more flexible in regard to their parental and household tasks and their division.

The equality in gay and lesbian couples helped many of them in avoiding conflicts over traditional gender roles division, which often leads to arguments and dissatisfaction in heterosexual couples.

Researchers also say that lesbian and gay couples often show more caring approach towards their children and each other.

Besides, the scientists also claim that lesbian couples were emotionally closer than gay couples and gay couples were closer in comparison to straight couples.

Is it so surprising to us? Many gays and lesbian live feeling different from others and they learn to be flexible and more loyal due to this fact. They understand that a key to healthier relationships lies in understanding and more respect towards each other.

The greater emotional closeness can also be explained by the fact that gays and lesbian are more attached towards each other and also try to stay together to deal with the obstacles and other people's prejudices and attitude.

This is a true example, that gay couples deserve to have their own family and live their way in healthy relation.